“NaNoWriMo 2020 Pt. 5”

Author’s Note: This is a Take Ten to Write story and has not been proofread for errors. If I feel inspired or if there’s interest in the story, I’ll post a revised, edited, and extended version at a later date. Happy reading!

Additional note: In honour of National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo), all 30 stories written in the month of November will (hopefully) create a single multi-part story that will reach its conclusion by the end of the month. Stay tuned for a new story part every day!

Read the compiled NaNoWriMo TTtW story here!

Prompt: “Please forgive me.”

SKYE’S POV

“Please forgive me.”

How many times have I said those words? How many more times will I have to say them?

And why does my stupid mind even think that I deserve forgiveness? I’m a murderer. That’s the truth, whether I like it or not.

Sure, I could chalk it up to self-defense and survival, but if I’m being honest with myself, that’s not a good enough excuse.

Once upon a time, I would’ve rather died than take another’s life.

How long ago that feels now.

I sigh as I stumble through the forest. I never realized before how much I had, how fortunate I was. I guess you hear it all the time, “You don’t know how lucky you are!” Of course I didn’t realize it then. Why would I even think about it? Why, when there was even more to have?

And, of course, I’d dropped by backpack full of supplies before I’d fled from the camp. I thought I’d heard someone and the pack had slipped right off my shoulder. I’d been too spooked to even think about grabbing it before bolting.

But there’s no way I’m going back to see if it’s still there. It’s probably completely safe, seeing as ours was the only camp on this side of the river, but I can’t bear the thought of going back and seeing what I’d done.

Forgiveness… No. I don’t deserve it.

Nor do I deserve mercy. So, I’ll suffer. Because that’s what I deserve.

Garrett would’ve tried to convince me otherwise. He always saw the best in me. No matter how much of a jerk I was being that day, he would always find a way to make me remember that I was a good person.

Hah, I challenge you to find something good about me now, Garrett. Find something beautiful in your monster of a girlfriend.

I sink to my knees in the dirt. I miss him. More than anything. I just hope that he’s still alive. Maybe if I saw him again, I’d be able to remember a time when I wasn’t… this.

But even then, I don’t think I’d be able to forgive myself.

Final Comments: Wow, it took my five mini-chapters to realize that Skye doesn’t have a real destination or goal other than wandering around aimlessly…

Overall Rating: 🤦‍♀️